Shut up already

Greetings to all you readers out there(although I'm not sure I have any). When are sports figures going to learn to shut their mouths. Or in Roger Clemens case open it. These guys have the worst timing in the world.

2 headed monster in the Desert

So long Dan. You took the ball whenever the bell rang. Now you have an incredible opportunity to join a youth movement that keeps gaining momentum. Today the A's sent Dan Haren to Arizona for a ton of blue chip prospects. In a move that A's fans were dreading all through the Winter Meetings Billy Beane replenished a farm system that was looking bleak. The D'Backs got a complimentary horse for the stable head Brandon Webb. Where this leaves Randy Johnson rotation-wise is still yet to be seen. Immediately Haren has hoisted Arizona's expectations even higher. The D'backs now have 1-2 starters who haven't thrown less than 217 innings in the past three years. Losing Jose Valverde's 47 saves from the back-end of the bullpen to Houston in another deal earlier in the day definitely stung. Chris Burke is a young position player still trying to find his stroke and Chad Qualls is a serviceable middle man. The other pitcher in the deal Juan Gutierrez is too young to forecast. The winners for next season are the D'backs with Haren and the Astros with a shutdown closer in Valverde. Down the line the A's part of the deal will pan out and they might earn more in offseasons to come.

The real winners of this deal are the Oakland A's fans. We lose an eventual staff ace, but we don't have to deal with the circus tent hovering over the Coliseum if Barry comes to town. He will only sign(take a paycut)for a contending team. Since Billy Beane has raised the white flag we are no longer in the Bonds bermuda triangle media event. I recently tore BB a new ass for getting rid of our beloved Marco Scutaro, but at least he isn't going to sell out.

Other topics I would like to add are the sad news of seeing Jack Cust's name on the Mitchell Report and the lack of Red Sox on that list. Are we to seriously believe a team that has won two championships in a 4 year span didn't have a single juicer using? I guess they are far enough from the East Coast and Bay Area to not be touched by steroid taint. Bullshit. They are fortunate enough to have the lead investigator sit on their board of directors. Oh wait he took a leave of absence from that position while slitting open the underbelly of the steroid era(more like heavy petting the underbelly). Great choice Bud. That choice won't bring up conflict of interest stories. Bud do yourself a favor and step down from the Commissioners spot and get back to the Owners Box. That's were your judgment has been all these years. The MLB needs to have an impartial "fan"....yes thats right I said fan! We are the people who know what is right for the game. We sell our souls for teams that would spit on you if your lead fist wasn't full of green and still come smiling to the ballpark. I'm not talking about the ass that goes to every game, but rarely sees it because he is wasted. Not that fan. Someone who knows the history of the game. Loves to see Eras change from generation to generation. I will be appointing myself in 15-20 years. I would do it now, but my receding hairline isn't quite to the "trustable" stage as of my 27th year. That is all.

Mitchell Report

Now that all the smoke has cleared after the explosion let's examine where we go from here. You had the words of George "I'm on the Red Sox Board" Mitchell telling us he had no cooperation from current players and that we should move forward and not dwell on the names he listed in his "impartial" report. We have Bud "Not my fault" Selig saying this report was needed to start removing ourselves from the steroid era. Fat chance Bud. I definitely enjoyed his dodgy comments about the total cost of the investigation. Something along the lines of it would have cost more to not have this investigation. Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight. The final contestant in the fall-out press conference sweepstakes was Donald "Remember me from '94" Fehr. His take was supposedly how the Players Union feels. The main thing I got from his statement was that he is upset that players(mainly Clemens) reputations were permanently tainted. Over the past few years nobody who has been implicated has been proven to be wrongly accused. Your name doesn't accidently get tossed into goverment investigations without some questionable behavior. Unfortunately I was not permitted a podium and national media coverage for my $0.02, but here it is. This whole charade has just been a smoke screen for the fans. MLB felt they should flex a little muscle, throw a few sacrificial lambs on the fire and take some partial responsibility. There is no way the Players Union or MLB will allow the testing to be administered by an outside party. That would be letting outsiders in on the dirty laundry. The most interesting number I heard yesterday was 60. That is the MAXIMUM number of random drug tests allowed during Spring Training. 750 players and only 60 tests. Talk about giving cheaters a chance to hide. Other allegations were of Union officials tipping off players before they were to be tested. There's a shocker. My feelings are that no real results will come of this investigation. As a fan I will not use the names on the list as ammo to rip someone the next time I go out to the ballpark. The most disappointing name on the list is Jack Cust. The only reason to watch the A's last year. It just served as a reminder that anything that I believe as real from the past 20 years has probably had an invisible asterisk next to it. The best memory that was stirred up from reading the report yesterday was of Roger Clemens. This past season the Yanks were in town to play a weekend series against the Giants. My buddy and I made it out to the ballpark early and gave it to Roger Clemens during BP. We must've said something right since he turned to us and pointed at his ring finger alerting us to the fact he sold out and earned some championships with NY. When he really should of bent over and pointed to his ass cheek, but I guess I can't blame him for keeping that gesture to himself while in SF.

Final Verdict:

Baseball will be back in 2008 and people will go to the ballpark. Hopefully the players, owners and commissioner will stop with the tough talk and realize that the viewing public is not as stupid as they think. We know it's all been a sham, but the game is too great for these ego maniacs to drag it down.

The week that was...

It's way too early to try and figure out the NBA season, but one statement has been made. Steve Nash will win the MVP for a 3rd time in 4 years. I know, I know we all agree he was robbed by Dirk last year so I can't be as open with the Hall of Fame talk just yet.......keep that in mind though. The Phoenix Suns are off to a 16-4 start due in large part to the unselfish leadership of ol' #13. In the past 5 games Nash has handed assists out like stripper ads on the Vegas strip. 83 to be exact. In this order 14-15-17-18-19 Nash has shown the opponent every weapon the Suns have this year. Whether it's feeding Amare Stoudemire in the paint, Dishing to Raja Bell beyond the arc or hitting streaking vet Grant Hill anywhere on the floor this basketball team has learned to share. With all these pieces Nash is setting a pace for a career high in assists. He'll get back on track with the MVP's and the Suns will finally have the pieces for a chipper in the desert....All the local talk about the A's and Giants has been bammer. The G-men are offered a solid young OF in Alex Rios from the Canucks up North, but they are unwilling to part with Tim Lincecum. Personally I believe that Matt Cain is the true ace of this staff. Lincecum while full of potential(which never got anyone anywhere)and electric stuff is still unproven. I guess this conversation would be moot if SF had scored runs when Cain took the hill. We wouldn't be comparing the kid to a 20-game winner. Offense is whats needed, but for some unknown reason the GM is interested in apppeasing the unrealistic fans calls to keep the kid. Good luck with the doughnut holes on your side of the scoreboard next year. Oakland is toying with the idea of signing Barry Bonds. I know he falls in the mold of OB% and power, but his karma will bring down the Green and Gold. Maybe I'll be wrong and he will last a year like Milton Bradley did. If the A's lose Dan Haren and/or Joe Blanton this offseason no free agent signing is going to help Oaktown....This weekend the Cards battle the SeaChickens in the Emerald City. AZ is trailing Seattle by 2 games(coincidentally they lost 2 games to the hapless 9ers....DAMN) and with 4 to go needs a miracle to catch them for the division title. Playoffs are within site, but a loss this week definitely sets them back. I willl wear my Cards gear and keep the faith, but this season is fading fast.

The weekend that was...

How can you deny an undefeated team? That was the question I was asking on Saturday, but nobody else seemed to care. After Hawaii's thrilling 35-28 come from behind victory over Washington Saturday night I was sure that BCS pundits would be bringing their name up in the top 5. Once again I was reminded that I have no idea how top 25 teams are picked. Supposedly there is some kind of formula that spits out teams and this odd average number next to their name on the top 25 list. I am going to state it once and for all. Hawaii(being the only undefeated team) has just as much right to claim the top spot as any team this year. It kills me that there are SEVEN 2-loss teams above the Hawaii squad. Please spare me the "They didn't play anyone" line that has been spewed out like pee soup from Linda Blair. Ohio State will be playing for the National Championship on January 7th and they played an almost equal cream puff schedule to that of Hawaii. Of course this could all be moot if Hawaii gets creamed by Georgia in the Sugar Bowl, but the Warriors juggernaut hasn't been halted yet. Who wouldn't root for a sqaud whose coach dresses more relaxed than Bill Belichick? I'm waiting for the June Jones selfmade sleeveless Hawaiian shirt in the Sugar Bowl.....This weekend the Arizona Cardinals kept their slim playoff hopes alive. Let me say this folks: The Cards have no business in the playoffs this year. Besides that everyone in the NFC is playing for the right to be annihilated by the Patriots in February this team lacks the discipline and defense to win in January. Trust me I have spent too many seasons following this team only to have my guts ripped out by mid-November. I love the fact that parity has allowed the Desert Dwellers to join the playoff talk. The loss last week to the hapless 49ers alone proves this team can't stomach the big games. I hope to god I am wrong and they make a playoff push with a 10-6 record. We have gone too far to fold it up since our draft position is going to be middle of the pack. Hopefully Kurt Warner can hoist the deep ball one more time and lead a squad to promise land. No I didn't smoke a bong load before I wrote that statement....Can MLB whore itself anymore with this updates on Winter Meetings and blockbuster trades? I could care less who signs were or whos being dangled for a coveted starting pitcher or overweight 3rd baseman. This is the time of year where we are reminded why the 6 months out of season are the worst for a baseball fan. We have only 1 true day of football(not counting mindless Thursday and Saturday sprinkling from here on out)and basketball and hockey highlights that remind me to drink the kool-aid when Xenu tells me to. Come February I will click on my baseball website and start looking at rosters to see what the season holds. No earlier!

Farewell Marco

I received the shock of my life on Sunday afternoon. While firmly planted in my recliner with a full stomach my sporting world was rocked to the foundation. Scrolling across the bottom of the screen was news of Marco Scutaro's trade from the Oakland Athletics. I didn't believe it at first. cried out for someone to tell me I was having an acid flashback or something. No such luck. Upon running to the computer to verify this outrageous claim I was met with two names that will draw my venom for years to come. Kristian(I can't believe a man has this name) Bell and Graham Godfrey. These are the two minor league pitchers received by Oakland in the trade. It pains me that Billy Beane felt that 2 pitchers were all he could get for the best utility man in the game. I would've at least asked for some cash or maybe a 12-pack of Molson(since they were trading with the Toronto Blue Jays). Even if these guys become 20-game winners or save 40 games I will never forgive them for aiding and abetting the departure of Marco. He epitomized the heart that typical Oakland teams have come to show over the years. Nobody embodied the underdog spirit more than Scutaro. His clutch at-bats when the game was on the line will be sorely missed in the Biggity Biggity-O. On more than one occasion I have come within a breath of crashing my car while listening to Marco win a ball game for the A's. His finest moment that I witnessed at the Coliseum came when the A's battled the Twins in the 2006 ALDS. With the game on the line he served a 2-out 3-rbi double down the RF line to put the game on ice. I still remember him posing like spider-man with his hands stretched out in a safe-call motion as the play developed at the plate. I also remember the bruise on my knee when I slammed the cupholder jumping up and down. It was well worth it. Plus the look on my girlfriends face while I high fived the guy next to her who had the worst case of BO I have ever encountered will be etched in my mind until the day I die. Another fine moment that will stand to prove his clutchness happened early in the 2007 season when he took a 2-out 0-2 fastball from Mariano Rivera and clanked it off the foul pole to win the game in the bottom of the 9th. My buddy and I greeted Rivera during batting practice at PacBell Park later that year with the "Marco....Scutaro" chant. He even turned to give us a glare which we took as success in our attempt to get under his skin. He also cemented his place in my heart when he changed his number from 49 to 19 after his 1st season with the Oakland. All in all this proves to be the biggest offseason move, in my mind, prior to the 2008 season. With all the talk of A-hole and the Yankees this will fly under the radar, but I will secretly be rooting for Toronto to rise up in the AL East and slay the Yanks and Red Sox this coming season. I know Mariano Rivera will lose sleep over his next encounter with Scutaro.

The weekend that was...

...who else is really enjoying the Green Bay revival. I don't want to make this a Favre nutriding comment, but damn that boy is kicking ass. Everything seems to be going his way. He threw a surefire pick in the endzone on Sunday only to have the 2 defenders tip it to each other and then into the Packers hands for a TD. With the subtle hint of a running game this Packer squad looks better and better every Sunday. Keep it up fellas the NFC needs someone to represent them in January...I usually don't like to harp on people that piss me off, but the 8......let me type that again.......eight interceptions thrown by the Manning brothers yesterday were absolutely beautiful. I guess daddy didn't tell them to have good games. Although the bulk of the load(6)were thrown by Peyton I still think Eli had the worse day. His squad, rolling on 6 straight wins, was supposed to make a statement about their place in the NFC. They certainly did with an 11-point loss to the Cowboys. I strongly dislike TO, but thank you for giving young Eli a money shot he won't soon forget...Oh by the way Hell has frozen over. We are now more than half way through the season and the Arizona Cardinals have a playoff pulse. Pulling off a shocking win over the Detroit Lions 31-21. Although favored by 2 points many folks didn't give AZ any chance of winning this game. Kurt Warner came through with his typical game(259yds,3tds,1int) and the ground game eeked out just enough yards to sustain the lead. The defense was led by Karlos Dansby(2 ints,1 forced fumble, 4 tackles). The Lions were held to -18 yards rushing which is the second fewest givien up by and Cardinals team in history. With Seattle playing the 49ers tonight on Monday night it could mean a 1st place tie in the NFC West tomorrow morning. Believe me as a life long Cardinal supporter I am just as disgusted that a 4-5 record can hold 1st place, but damn am I glad to have meaningful games this late in the year...On to baseball news. Joe Torre who recently made me sick by signing to manage the LA Dodgers has been hinting that A-hole(Alex Rodriguez new name)is looking to sign with the Dodgers. to be honest I don't care where he signs as long as it isn't with the Giants. I have dedicated my baseball karma to keeping the Curse of A-hole alive until he retires. Meaning no championships to any squad he suits up for. It worked in Texas and New York. Hopefully enough baseball loving Americans share in this feeling. Oh and if the Giants are serious about signing A-hole they better have rights to selling that oil in the Bay and a few hidden diamond mines in the Silicon Valley. Otherwise keep it in your pants and start building a farm system that produces hitters and position players.

1:06pm thoughts

I did my best to avoid all the hype surrounding the Colts-Pats game from last weekend. It more than lived up to the hype with the Pats winning 24-20. Tom Brady showed why the patriots are never out of a ballgame and Peyton Manning showed a little slip in his game management skills. Of course this game will be rendered meaningless if the Pats don't win it all.....Who the f**k gave Don Shula a platform to spew senile old man rants? Nobody cares what the coach of the '72 Dolphins thinks about New Englands attempt at a perfect season. Shula's squad that went 17-0 and won the Super Bowl had an average Opponents Winning % of .387. Yeah thats right. They played nobody and struggled to get there. The Pats have dismantled all comers and overcame their first challenge this past week. Hey Don stick to saying things that you get payed for like "Hey Marino" from those ridiculous weight loss commercials.....The NFC has nobody that can even put up a fight against the whoever the AFC champion is this year. I am loving Brett Favre's rennaissance, but without a more solid running attack we are going to see ol' number 4 heaving up 4 picks in the playoffs.....Oh waitress my order will be 3 tall beers and the New York Steak. Thanks to my ultra positive(possibly drugged)buddies I will be raking in a wonderful meal on their dime when the GS Warriors are eliminated from the playoffs in a few months. The 0-4 start has definitely got me smiling, but it's more than the losses that have me brimming with confidence. The poor crunch time free throw attempts and the lack of halfcourt game when they have a lead are glaring similarities to previous Whorrior teams. Oh waitress can I see the dessert cart when you get a chance.....RIP all youthful baseball memories. This week a report surfaced that former SF Giants 3B Matt Williams was taking growth hormone in 2002. He came out and responded to the allegations and said it was for an ankle injury. Whether or not he did it before is a non issue. I have long since prepared myself for the revelation that all my childhood heroes will be dragged into the conversation at one point or another. This picture says it all........Greg Maddux deserves a clap on the back. By earning his 17th Gold Glove the other day he has surpassed all time great Brooks Robinson and Jim Kaat for most all time. It might be the fact his glove is the size of Rhode Island or that pitchers in general just suck balls at fielding in todays game. You decide......Instant Replay has finally infested the game of baseball. My prediction is within the next 15 years balls and strikes will be called by computer systems and the human element in umpiring will be eliminated. Not good.......I now decree that we shall no longer refer to Alex Rodriguez as A-Rod. From this moment on he will be called A-hole.......While drinking in the parking lot after a recent softball game the perfect team name struck me. You are looking at the next manager for the Parking Lot Pimps of your local D-League co-ed softball team. Bottoms up...

What a long strange trips it's been...

...Okay, okay you can't call a four game season a long strange trip, but
we sure as hell earned those baby blue badges of courage that were on
display at Fridays. They say that pitching and defense wins
championships. I think dropping 46 runs in two games on the opponents
might have a little do to with it as well.

You can't start anywhere else on the field, but in the middle of the
diamond. Andy firing dart after dart was lights out. With Janice calling
pitches(and saving Bobs life a few times) behind the dish there was no
stopping this duo. Helping his own cause Andy decided that he wasn't
going to screw around anymore and jacked a few balls over the fence. And
while were on the topic of fences "Edwin I got the outfield walls phone
number for you". Although the fence was quite upset you had to kiss and
run. Nice catch stud! The corner outfield positions were filled
admirably by a couple of sweet swinging gamers. Mark roaming the Left
Field line "because his old lady made him" decided to join the Crews
shortstop in the long walk back to the dugout after jacking an
out......over the fence. Joe with his smooth swing kept everyone in the
dugout alive with his blistering shots that peppered the 1st baseline.
4-H club beware. Proving that hot hitting is contagious the corners of
the infield decided to dust off the sticks and bring some leather too.
Bryan decided to take time off from his treatment in the trainers office
and grace the line-up with his presence. Even having to let a tool from
the other team know that they were being "very Un-dude". Patrolling the
'Hot Corner' was none other than Lina. She had a pressing engagement of
packing for a trip, but felt the team needed her for the playoff push.
While flashing some leather she decided to break out the playoff caliber
grunt at the plate. Shouting out "Let the girls play" with screaming
line drives to infinity and beyond. Dina stepping in for an injured 2nd
sacker adapted well to the new position, but looked a little tired out
there(obviously still shellshocked from the nuptials). Bringing her
determined game face to the batters box turned out to be nothing but
aces for the Crew. Stepping up to take over the duties in the 1st base
coaches box was Tess. Not only did she bring her baserunning expertise
to the table, but also a very large stick that seemed to encourage
people to pass Go and collect $200 at 2nd base. Finally a few words on
our fearless leader. Regina brought to the team a desire to win and
swing at as many bad pitches as possible. With the use of one good
leg(although rumored to have been caught dancing on a few bars after
curfew)she kept defying the odds and kept her spot at the top of the
line-up. It probably helped that she was writing the line-up, but who
really cares about that now. Wanting only a shirt and not caring what
further injuries lie ahead she braved the soggy outfield and made a few
nice stabs(although her form and lack of practice did give Andy some
raised blood pressure on the mound). Bringing that disciplined swing to
the park last night led to many adventures around the bases which makes
me wonder if she should have also brought a walker. A few lashings from
Tess got her in gear though. One of the key front office moves by Reg
had to have been getting that guy from behind the front desk to come out
and play shortstop for her. The jury is still out on if that move paid
off or not. I hear his agent is going to be asking for beer dispensing
batting helmets for next season.

Good job everybody. Wear your powder blue shirts with pride or just
change your oil in 'em. Either way we all did a little bit to earn 'em.
Way to take out the trash Clean Up Crew!

19

Takin' out the Trash

The setting was Lions Field on a chilly October evening. The '07 softball season was winding down and the playoffs were upon us. Pre-season experts picked the Clean-Up Crew to roll through the competition and don another championship t-shirt. Not so easy was the road. After stumbling into the postseason with a 2-2 record the Crew was not firing on all cylinders, but like any championship caliber team they rose to the occasion when it mattered most.

Starting the evening off was a routine pre-game stretch at Chili's. Team Skipper Regina "You guys are amazing" Fisicaro pondered her line-up over a few cocktails. What she assembled was an offensive Juggernaut that left pitchers trembling and had air traffic controllers changing landing patterns at SFO. The first game of the evening was against an old opponent. The Dirty Dozen had to feel good about their chances since this is a game that involves underhand pitching. Unfortunately the Crew put up 13 runs in the top of the 1st and never looked back. The offensive attack was led by none other than Bryan "Has that sum bitch landed yet" McKevitt. His brutal attack on the Lions Field outhouse has league officials thinking of moving the fences back to San Bruno Mountain. Like all good line-ups there was power provided from both sides of the plate. Matt "Moonshot" Schaukowitch manned 1st base and generally scared the shit out of any runner we had at first base during his at-bats. Timely hitting was delivered by the entire line-up en route to a 28-6 ass whoopin' to get us into the chipper against the Softballers.

The nightcap was all about pitching and defense because hey we all know thats what wins championships. Mike "Peck-Peck" Peckham threw a series of chronically devastating pitches that left the Softballers green with envy. His focus and concentration, even with a squirter in box, left a good feeling with all Hall of Fame voters. His battery mate Janice "105 humpability rating" Lopez called one of helluva game. Adding clutch hits and running the bases like lightning is her game and she let the league know she is hitting her prime softball years. Holding down the hot corner was none other than Annette "I'm not getting in front of that one" Fragomeni. This writer once wrote she was a key free agent acquisition, but now she has come into her own as a force to be reckoned with. Realizing the fruitcakes on the other squad were aiming for her she silently baited them into ripping line drive after line drive until one of their own was pegged while occupying 3rd base(Props to that chick for popping up and trying to score with only 1 leg). The double play combo up the middle consisted of Ryan "White t-shirt" Brooks and Sarah "MVP" Muscat. Interviewing the SS after the game he only had this to say "Sarah sets the pace and I just try to keep up". Truer words have never been spoken. Whether it was ripping liners in the gap or turning double plays on her own this gal has cemented her place in Clean-Up Crew folklore. Roaming the outfield was Kevin "No outs" Kuehner and Mark "4H" Schaukowitch. I caught up with the head of the 4H club after the game and was told of the damage. Two Hydrangeas and a goat were the final tally. I'm sure it will be expensed by the CHP since it did happen withing a mile of 101. Kevin brought his stick and most importantly his ears to the yard last night. Playing in the OF next to the Skipper requires a good set of eyes and a Dr. Phil psychology degree. Helping Regina through her "I'm sorry" phase and catching an occasional flyball is all that was asked and he delivered beautifully. Jarrett "Hold on I'm getting a call" Laws handled the 1st base coaching duties and without his sage advice nobody would've taken the extra base. The paid attendance for the game was 7 folks(plus the scorekeeper)and that was just enough to witness another championship for the Clean-Up Crew. The offseason rumblings of players opting out of their contracts and possible trades will work itself out before next spring. For right now though "We are the Champions"

Monday Morning Rant

Let's start this rant off with a nice big "Fuck you" to Alex Rodriguez and his parasite agent Scott Boras. Once again those two have found a way to make me say "Down in front" while I am watching the MLB playoffs. Leave it to Fox's annual Douchebag of October Joe Buck to spend the late innings of Game 4 talking about some a-hole who can't even make it to the World Series. Rodriguez will be forfeiting the final $72 million of his contract to go find greener pastures. Now I am sure that people out there will say "Wouldn't you be interested if someone wanted to give you a $300 million contract?". To them I say of course, but I haven't made $170 million already playing baseball for 14 years. When is it enough? He'll be the first sports figure ever to sign TWO 9 figure contracts and still not come up clutch when his team needs him. He'll smile pretty for the cameras and do more commercials and have an accent when it suits his needs, but he'll never be a team player. I bet the happiest guy in NY is Derek Jeter. Now he doesn't have to cover for Rodriguez sorry ass when he doesn't carry his weight......Congrats Red Sox. You won another title. Now please go away. No seriously get the hell out of here. I'm tired of watching your homeless guy out in LF toss his batting helmet while he runs the bases. I want to punch the TV whenever I see your dork of an owner cover his ears because the stadium is too loud for his whittle ears. Also I have lost my fondness of nutriders like Royce Clayton being wired for sound during the Great Taco Steal of 2007. If I have to hear one more announcer compare Jason Varitek to a soldier in the armed forces I am going to wage my own personal Jihad. There are a few things I enjoy about Boston. Dustin Pedroia, Jacoby Ellsbury and Bobby "Fucking" Kielty. That's it!......Another weekend of football has passed and the Patriots killed another JV team. This week people will talk the Colts-Pats game to death and thats fine. To the Patriots it will be just another speedbump on the way to their 4th SuperBowl. No more talk of anyone else winning it this year. Barring an injury to Tom Brady this shit is over. Hopefully they can go 16-0 and get those damn '72 Dolphins off their pedestal......Could it actually happen? Will the justice system finally catch up the OJ? Only time will tell, but with all his accomplices turning states evidence it's only a matter of time until the lights turn out on the Juice......College football is a joke. I enjoy a good game and last years Boise State bowl game is one of the best football finishes you will ever see, but this season is lost. No team is a clear cut #1, but someone will unfortunately be crowned with 1 loss. One of these days the BCS will be tossed out and a playoff will be implemented. Hopefully I am not 75 years old when this happens......Did the NFL really send the Giants and Dolphins to London? Was this to downgrade footballs stock overseas? You would be hard pressed to find a worse game to show over there. The final score of 13-10 must've been riveting to all those 'fans' across the pond. Having the winning team's QB throw for a whopping 59 yards must've planted the seeds of greatness in a few young blokes. It should've been Rams v Dolphins. At least someone would've celebrated like it was the Super Bowl for getting in the win column. I bet the over/under on years back that game set football is 25.....The kiss of death came for the Rockies during their 8 day lay off. Not because of any rust that set in, but because the Manning brothers endorsed them. It would be difficult to think of two people I wouldn't want on my side more than those 2 guys. One is an over-caffeinated audible calling egghead(probably one of the greatest QBs of all-time)and the other is a wimp who looks like he may cry at any moment. Yeah, yeah, yeah two of the Rockies players backed them up in college. That is worthless information that was regurgitated 25 times during the Series. Next time I root for a team I am going to check and see what celebrities have jumped on the bandwagon......My final venom shot is directed at the Red Sox RF. I have spent many an afternoon yelling at this guy from my seat at PacBell and the Oakland Coliseum. I didn't like him when he spurned the Phils for more money when they drafted him(Due to the prick who represents Alex Rodriguez) and I sure as hell can't stand someone who opts out of deals they sign to go get more money. Now I have learned that this posers real name is David Jonathan Drew. That's right it's DJ Drew! No longer will I refer to him as JD since I do not have dyslexia. The fact that folks play along with this and call him JD is beyond me. Hey guys I want you to call me Darryl from now on. That's not your name. I know, but I feel like changing it up a little so just call me that. Okay buddy. Yeah that conversation sounds just as ridiculous to me as it does to you. That is all.

RollerBall Review

So you are sitting at home complaining there is nothing to watch on the tube and your Netflix queue is not getting it done. I've got a movie for you. To begin it stars James Caan. If that doesn't get you interested than you might be more suited for a Olsen twins movie. First you need a background on the game of Rollerball. It's played on a banked track with men on rollerskates. Yeah I know rollerskates are silly, but hey it was 1975. Each team has skaters and bikers who help them get around the track. Going counter clockwise the two teams try to field a metal ball that is shot out onto the track. Each team tries to score by stuffing the ball into a small goal defended by the other team. Pretty much everything else goes. Men get killed and the offender gets a 3 minute penalty if they get caught. Caan plays Jonathan E. The most storied Rollerballer in history. The year is 2018 and his Houston team is on the verge of winning another championship. The world is now controlled by Corporations. No more countries. No more wars. You come to find that the game is used by corporate society to show that individuals cannot survive on their own. Soon after we see Jonathan's domination on the track he is told to retire. Put this on the same level as telling Tom Brady to quit right before the Super Bowl. The movie shows Jonathan trying to figure out who is behind this decision and how far they are willing to go to keep him from continuing. Without going any further the movie draws it's conclusion on the track with Houston and New York battling for the championship. It's definitely old school and might take some getting used to from the beginning, but give it a chance. You will definitely appreciate it's tone and stance on corporate society and how our lives will be run if we don't speak up.

Rocks and Sox Game 2

Well the old man did it again. Curt Schilling and his diminished fastball held another playoff opponent in check. Only two Rockies players managed to get a hit(Matt Holliday had 4 and Brad Hawpe had 1)off Boston pitching. Schilling kept every hitter except Holliday off balance for the forst 5 1/3. Hideki Okajima came in and bridged the gap to Papelbon with 2 1/3 scoreless innings. The only run scored for Colorado when Todd Helton grounded out in the 1st with Willy Taveras on 3rd. The Sox tied it up in the 4th with a SacFly from team captain Jason Varitek. Mike Lowell came up with an RBI-double in the 5th that would stand as the winning run. Ubaldo Jimenez pitched 4 2/3 innings with 5 walks and 2 earned runs. The Rockies bullpen held up the rest of the way, but the bats were eerily silent. The man responsible for the bulk of Colorado's offense was also the culprit in ending their late inning rally. Matt Holliday singled up the middle in 8th inning, but was immediately picked off by Boston's closer Jonathan Papelbon. That summed up the Rocks visit to Fenway for the first 2 games of the series. Hopefully a return home will re-charge this club and get 'em back in it.

Oh yeah

DANE COOK MUST HAVE HIS HEAD RIPPED OFF AND VOCAL CHORDS COMPLETELY SEVERED SO I DON'T EVER HAVE TO HEAR HIM SAY "THERES ONLY ONE OCTOBER" EVER AGAIN!


That is all.

Rocks and Sox - Game 1

I guess people will blame the days of rest for Colorados weak showing in Game 1 last night. Josh Beckett would have something else to say about it. While striking out 9 during his seven inning gem he also tossed 62 strikes amongst his 93 pitches. It never hurts when your offense provides 13 runs on 17 hits. Leading the strike was David Ortiz with his 3 hit- 2 RBI night. The Red Sox had 4 other players knock in 2 runs apiece. Dustin Pedroia started things off with a leadoff homer tossed from rocky starter Jeff Francis. The Rockies staff also tossed 8 walks at this potent Boston line-up. The only offensive spark came from rookie SS Troy Tulowitzki who had an RBI double in the 2nd inning. After that Colorado had few scoring opportunities the rest of the evening. Veteran Todd Helton went 2 for 4 in his first World Series game. Tonights starter Ubaldo Jimenez has his work cut out for him against Francona's bunch. The Sox counter with Curt Schilling. His resume need not be reviewed on this forum. Schill has dominated in the post-season whether it be home or away. In the desert or Yankee Stadium. He'll pitch solid innings and make it tough for the Rocks to get a split in Boston.

My guess Rocks 5 Sox 4

Rocks and the Sox

World Series. That term seems to fire me up even if my favorite team isn't in it. Tonight we have to very different teams starting a series that will definitely captivate baseball fans. The Red Sox have over 100 years of tradition to the Rockies 15. The Red Sox have proven Post-Season Horses in their stable. The Rockies have new faces looking for their first rings. Enough of that bullshit. On to the Scouting Report. Since the NL AllStars were weak and couldn't beat the AL we'll start with the Beantown.

Red Sox

The Sox will bring a heavy arsenal of bats to the plate. Manny Ramirez and David Ortiz will always be looming, but the role players have stepped it up. Kevin Youkilis and Mike Lowell have been driving in runs when caled upon. The skipper Francona appreciated JD Drew finally earning a paycheck or two. I had forgotten he even played RF in Fenway. Jacoby Ellsbury has been on the Warpath recently. In essence cementing his spot in CF when the Sox go for their second championship in 4 years. Catcher Jason Varitek has been pretty silent with the bat, but he has done his best work behind the plate. His game calling skill has shown although having Beckett and Schilling in the postseason never hurts. Matsuzaka finally went the minimum and got the victory in Game 7 of the ALCS. I'm sure Francona will be wary of leaving him in too long in Colorado where crooked numbers find their way on the board. Papelbon will be dancing no more jigs if he doesn't handle the meat of the order in the 9th.

Rockies

These guys have some kind of 4 leaf clover in their back pockets. Check Jamey Carroll he may be a little leprechaun! Every call, every bounce and every single break has gone their way for the past month. Matt Holliday still hasn't touched the plate and yet the Rockeis are in the World Series. Todd Helton will definitely show his all around skills on this grand stage. There will also be a ridiculous amount of defense from this squad. Troy Tulowitzki will show range that will have fans remembering his name in no time. Kaz Matsui has flashed marginally leather, but his speed and contact out of the 2 hole has been the difference maker. Bridging the gap from Willy Taveras to the big boppers has added runners on base. Garret Atkins and Brad Hawpe have cashed in this postseason. Hell! Yorvit Torrealba as even found some big fly. Did he learn that in SF or a Burlingame laboratory? The starters for Colorado will be Jeff Francis, Ubaldo Jimenez Josh Fogg(man I had this guy in fantasy leagues when he was younger) and Aaron Cook. We weren't sure what they looked like either. Just see the guy making outs and it's probably the bullpen. Manny Corpas has nailed down many coffins in the 9th, but getting to him is a different guy every night. Brian Fuentes has done the 8th. After him it's a combo of Jeremy Affeldt, Matt Herges and LaTroy Hawkins.


My prediction is that Boston keeps tearing the cover off the ball. Colorado will make dazzling defensive plays, but you can't catch balls that sail over the fence. I will have to go against my gut and say Colorado in 7.

The Unthinkable

I grew up in the San Francisco Bay Area during the 80's. That being said there are some things that are branded in my DNA. Huey Lewis and the News will always rock, Will Clark's face, no matter how silly looking, meant trouble for the opposing pitcher and Joe Montana is the greatest QB ever. Since 2001 that last comment has been under assault by a kid from San Mateo. Tom Brady burst on the scene in 2001 and has been a force ever since. I know, I know it is total sacrilege to even compare anyone to Joe Cool, but the numbers don't lie. In comparing the first 8 seasons in each QB's career you get an idea of how special Tom Brady really is.


Tom Brady
Comp% 62.7

Yds 23,689

TD 174
Int 80

Comp. 2,065

Att. 3,293

W/L 77-26

Joe Montana

Comp% 63.2

Yds 21,498

TD 141

Int 76

Comp. 1,818

Att. 2,878

W/L 69-51-1

With the way the Patriots are steam rolling over every opponent this year it is inevitable they will reach the Super Bowl(barring any catstrophic injuries). If they do win it will be Tom's 4th of his career. Will the Montana followers finally take a long hard look at the big picture and entertain thoughts of a Bay Area kid, who lists Joe Montana as his boyhood idol, replacing the ultimate clutch Quarter Back? Only time will tell...

Random Thoughts on a Thurday Afternoon...

...who really cares what athletes say about the importance of the game? The only time it should matter is if they had bet on the game(Damn you Pete!). Otherwise let......ugh.....Manny be Manny. The Sox need a solid performance from Beckett tonight and Schilling circa '01 to have any chance in this series.....I thought I might get tired of watching the Patriots kick the shit out of every team they play this year. Not happening. I have actually looked forward to seeing them try and put 40 on every team this year. I knew I heard a groan from the '72 Dolphins when the Pats finally got Tom Brady some big name receivers. I just didn't think it would be this fun......Once again I am opposing a Warrior run to the playoffs. After last years high there is no way that team can gel that way again. Unless BD stays healthy, Jackson steers clear of NRA events and Matt Barnes keeps his crazy MoHawk for an entire season. Biedrins is still a work in progress and I just hope he doesn't pan out to be a Pedro Feliz type project for Golden State.....Bravo to Joe Torre for turning down a contract offer from the Yankees. Every year it's the same thing with them. Torre gets them to the playoffs and they fail to meet the Boss' expectations. Finally Joe took the upper hand and told the Yankee brass to stuff their 5 million buck deal. Atta babe Joe. Go manage somewhere else in a few years and start another dynasty. Maybe the Cubs if Piniella doesn't get 'em past the 1st round next year. Joe gets to the playoffs with high payrolls........I remember going to the first Colorado Rockies game in San Francisco. June of 1993. My pops and I sat down the LF line and the Giants pummelled the Rockies 17-2. Highlights of the game were seeing Ding Dongs from Will Clark, Charlie Hayes, Robby Thompson(2) and a Granny from Bonds. The final was 17-2. Is'nt it ironic that it was a Colorado score @ Candlestick Park?

MLB playoffs Day 2

Another day in the cityof Brotherly Love. Same result on the diamond. This time it was a different character doing it with the bat for the Rockies. Kaz Matsui was the spark plug at the top of Colorado's line-up, but It was the 2nd batter in the order that got things started. Troy Tulowitzki and Matt Holliday went back to back in the 1st inning to get the Rox on the board, but Philly had a MVP candidate of their own with something to prove. SS Jimmy Rollins homered and tripled to give the Phils a 3-2 lead, but then Matsui struck with a grand slam in the 4th and an RBI triple in the 6th of his own. The Colorado bullpen stepped up to throw 6 innings of 2-run relief. Capping it with a 2 inning appearance for his 2nd save of the series was Manny Corpas. Philly 1st baseman Ryan Howard added a solo homer, but also got picked off 1st base. Going back to the Mountains with a 2 games to none lead is pretty muchh all that needs to be said about this series. Honorable Mention: Yorvit Torrealba


The Yankees bench had all the postseason experience, but Cleveland looked like the regulars. After falling behind early with CC Sabathia on the mound the Indians leaned on Kenny Lofton to do what he has done for years: light a spark. Lofton answered the call with a 3 hit-4 RBI night in route to a 12-4 victory. Yankees started Chien Ming Wang was ineffective giving up 8-runs in 4 2/3 innings. The tribe had 4 different players hit homers while Victor Martinez and Ryan Garko added 2 RBIs apiece. 8 of the 9 Indians in the line-up had at least 1 hit. The Yankees had sub-par production from their 2 thru 6 hitters( 1 for 16 ). Including an 0-4 night from the Captain Derek Jeter. The Yankees will now have to rely on the "Old Guys" Andy Pettitte and Roger Clemens to shoulder the load if they plan to make any noise in the series. Dishonorable Mention: Clevelands own Lebron James strolled into Jacobs Field wearing a NY hat. Lost a little respect there LJ.


The Valley of the Sun has proven no place for Cubs. The Diamondbacks used their potent young line-up and usual bullpen script to all, but seal the NLDS up. Starter Doug Davis got the victory despite giving up 4 runs due to a steady stream of zero's from the relief core. Tony Pena, Brandon Lyon and Jose Valverde each tossed a shutout inning with Valverde striking out the side in the 9th. Arizona got its offense from everyone chipping in. Anyone, Anytime as veteran Tony Clark says. Chris Young got it started with a 2 out three run homer and Eric Byrnes followed up a Stephen Drew single with a booming triple off the LF wall. Drew would also add a 2-run triple of his own in the 4th inning. Chicago added 8 hits of it's own, but nothing to speak of after Bob Melvin made his call to the bullpen.

Day 1 MLB Playoffs

I guess to say the first day of the playoffs was dominated by pitching would be an understatement. Here is a brief review of each game played today.

Starting with the morning game which was played in Philly. The Rockies kept their train a rollin' with a 4-2 victory. Lefty Jeff Francis took the hill and kept his strong season intact with a 6 inning - 2 hit effort. The only blip on the radar were back to back dingers from Aaron Rowand and Pat Burrell. The Phils offense did little else the rest of the day with the 1 thru 4 batters combining to go 0 for 15. Most notably Chase Utley receiving the Golden Sombrero with 4 strikeouts. The Rockies got it started on the offense with Todd Helton making the most of his first postseason at-bat by hitting a triple and scoring when 3B Garrett Atkins knocked an RBI double en route to a 3-run second inning. Matt Holiday spit out the mouthful of dirt from his Monday evening flop at the plate to add some insurance with a solo shot in the 8th inning. The Rockies bullpen didn't need it. Latroy Hawkins, Brian Fuentes and Manny Corpas each tossed a scoreless inning in route to the first postseason victory in Colorado since 1995.

In the afternoon Fenway was rocking and Josh Beckett was rolling. The Sox also beat the Angels 4-0, but that was secondary to the performance given by the Boston ace. In what surely would be described as a career game, for anyone who didn't already have a World Series win in Yankee Stadium on his resume, Beckett went the distance striking out 8 and scattering 4 hits. At one point after giving up a lead off single to Chone Figgins to start the game Beckett set down 20 batters in a row. Fittingly Bad Vlad Guerrero fouled off some tough pitches to get a single and break up the strong momentum Beckett had flowing. Angels starter John Lackey gave up long balls to Kevin Youkilis and David Ortiz. After tearing off 8 hits in the first 3 innings the Sox offense only added 2 more the rest of the day. With Beckett on the mound it didn't matter. With the day off tomorrow these teams will be back at it Friday night with Kelvim Escobar battling Daisuke Matsuzaka.


The nightcap featured reigning Cy Young winner Brandon Webb taking on fiery North-Sider Carlos Zambrano. Tonight both pitchers brought their A-game. Webb dealing 7 innings of 1 run ball with 9 k's. Equally effective was Zambrano who only allowed 1 run over 6 innings while fanning 8. The Cubs skipper Lou Piniella turned to the bullpen in the 7th inning to hold the game at 1-1, but the "kids" from AZ used their usual weapons to score a pair of runs off reliever Carlos Marmol. One coming via a solo homer by 3B Mark Reynolds and the other was catcher Chris Snyder scoring on a sacrifice fly when Manager Bob Melvin used pinch hitter Conor Jackson for Webb. It turned out to be the right call as the D'back bullpen turned in their performance du jour. A scoreless eight inning from Brandon Lyon and an equally impressive 9th from closer Jose Valverde. For what this Arizona club lacks in experience they more than make up for it with heart. 2nd year SS Stephen Drew got the scoring started when he took Zambrano deep in the 4th inning. This series is by no means won, but we may just be witnessing these youngsters turning into seasoned veterans before our very eyes.

And finally after 162 games...

...we have reached the postseason(almost). Just one more game to play when Colorado hosts the San Diego Padres tomorrow for the final playoff spot. Some decisions for seasonal awards are clear. Alex Rodriguez is the A.L. MVP, but the N.L. still has to decide whether Jimmy Rollins or Matt Holliday played more of a role for their respective teams playoff sprints. The A.L. Cy Young will fall to the Red Sox ace Josh Beckett, but in this biased chronicler's eye the N.L. crown still resides in the Valley of the Sun. The leading candidates for Rookie of the Year in the Americal League this year were Dustin Pedroia from the Sox or Delmon Young of the Tampa bay Devil Rays. Why not throw a bone to the sunshine state. The ROY race in the N.L. is more intriguing than any other award choice this year. The early pick was Ryan Braun(and early I mean after the All-Star break)who blasted on the scene on May 25th and ended the season with 34 longballs. His .324 average and 98 RBIs also blinded most folks from even looking elsewhere when asked about rising rookies. While just a little further out West the Rockies youth movement began to return dividends in a big way. Troy Tulowitzki began the season as the captain of the infield for the Blake Street Bombers(Yes we can dust off that moniker again) and after answering the bell for 154 of a possible 162 games it's clear the Rockies have that position filled for the better part of the next decade. Tulo's final numbers came in at .287, 24 HR, 98 RBIs and 101 Runs scored. It's true that Braun played in 41 less games and had almost 150 less at-bats, but there are other numbers that can jump out at you. Tulo played in 1,362 innings at SS with only 11 errors for a .987 fielding %. Braun got his 945 innings at 3rd base with 26 errors for a .894 fielding %. Either choice is going to be the right one. Since I ended up scoring a foul ball off Tulowitzki's bat in an early season game at PacBell Park this year I am pulling for the kid from the Rocky Mountains.

Cards come up short......AGAIN

Another beautiful Sunday, Another Cardinals choke job. There is almost more comfort in watching the RedBirds get creamed by 20 points then to see them come up short time and time again. My ulcer can't handle it. Once again my faith in the Cards coaching staff has been tested. Although the O-line is hands down better than it has been in years we failed to run the ball more than 13 times. I know, I know once you are down by 2 scores in the NFL you HAVE to pass the ball, but aren't the Cards as a franchise at the point of trying to buck old trends? Edge had a paltry 57 yards on 10 rushes yesterday. True that 27 yards came on one run, but take that away and he is still getting over 3 yards per rush. Unfortunately we relied on lefty to try and lead the offense, but he proved not up to the task. Ken Whisenhunt made a wise decision half way thru the 2nd quarter by putting Kurt Warner in to lead that offense to a field goal. Then in a truly baffling call he put Leinart back in and allowed him to sputter the offense for another quarter. By the time Whiz realized that Warner would be the answer for the day(5 minutes left in the 3rd quarter) it was already 20-6. This is where I call into question the heart of Larry Fitzgerald. The first play from scrimmage after Warner was re-inserted was a 27 yard pass play down the middle to Fitzgerald. As he was tackled the Balitmore DB Corey Ivy took it right out of his hands. This happens in football all the time, BUT watching the replays you can see Fitzgerald gives no effort to secure the ball or grab Ivy as he turned to run the other way. This play caused me to think back over the game and realize how many camera shots there were of Fitzgerald pouting on and off the field. Supposedly he is not happy with the new offensive philosophy of running the football as reports have surfaced in the past weeks to support the theory. Baltimore tacked on a field goal to make it 23-6 and put the game out of reach. Until Mr. Clutch Kurt Warner came through with drive after drive. Hitting Anquan Boldin for two 4th quarter TD's and leading the Cards down for a tying field goal late with 2 minutes left in the game. Overall he was 15-20 for 258 yards and 2 TD passes. The rest as we say is how the AZ Cardinals handle business. They allowed Kyle Boller(one of the weakest QB's in the league)to drive the ravens into field goal range were Matt Stover drove the dagger in the heart with a last second game winner. Yes there was help from the refs making a questionable call on Adrian Wilson's hit on Todd Heap, but our fate was sealed when Bryant Johnson couldn't hold an end zone pass from Warner on the series before. Questions to ask Whisenhunt the next time I see him. Why did it take so long to get Kurt Warner back in the game? Where did the running philosophy go?

38 and 19

It's funny the different times of my life that have coincided with witnessing Curt Schilling perfect his craft on the mound. He has triumphed and also failed on the grandest stage of all, the World Series. In 1993 I was a snot nosed teenager who inevitably knew everything about anything. In being this knowledgeable of a fellow I also knew that jumping off the stage at school during "Enter Sandman"may get me a little time in the doghouse. The 3-month grounding I received ran through late October which meant no watching of the Fall Classic between Philadelphia and Toronto. Watching on what seemed to be a 6 or 7 inch television with rabbit ears I saw Curt Schilling pitch complete game domination over a Toronto line-up that included PaulMoliter, Rickey Henderson, Roberto Alomar, Pat Borders,Joe Carter, John Olerud, and Tony Fernandez. Keeping those hitters in check was almost as difficult as keeping my mom from knowing I was watching the game. Listening for her footsteps as fiercely as Schilling silenced the Bluejay
bats. This particular experience ended bittersweet as Ole 38 won Game 5, but never got to come back on short rest to try and win a Game 7 as Joe Carter dashed my hopes with one swing.

Flash to 2001. As many folks were trying to figure out what it all meant at the end of that year, a veteran squad led by two fierce fireballers helped show what kind of spirit American sports were all about. This time getting to see Curt Schilling would forever rank in the top three of my baseball experiences. With a trusted partner in toe and Rand McNally at my finger tips I made my way down to the B.O.B. and saw with my own eyes Curt Schilling beat the hated Yankees in Game 1 of the 2001 World Series. Once again hurling a complete game for the ages as the D'Backs went on to a thrilling 7 game victory over "America's team". That series taught me the true meaning of David vs. Goliath. The only people in the entire country and world I should say rooting for the D'backs were in Arizona and scattered sparingly across the country. The support that New York got after 9/11 almost seemed an unfair advantage. I felt my man was going to give it his all, but believed that somewhere above the decision had been made that New York needed some healing after 9/11. What transpired was probably the most fulfilling World Series I will ever experience. Although Schilling would only end up with 1 victory although he started 3 games (leaving with a lead in Game 4 and throwing 7 solid innings inGame 7) the gods decided to shine on the true motor that ran the team and named Curt Schilling and Randy Johnson co-mvp's of the Series.

Blinkto2004. A line had been drawn in the sand. You had either been a red state
or a blue state. With these colors I mean rooting for the Red Sox or the Yankees. The Championship Series had provided more twists and turns then McQueen on Lombard. The momentum coming out of that Series and I think a little adrenaline too helped Curt Schilling enter the realm of mythic World Series performers. The "bloody sock" will be remembered by folks 20 years from now and they won't know why. It's recent enshrinement in Cooperstown guarantees the story will be told every year for the rest of our lives. Watching his 6 innings of mastery over a vaunted Cardinals line-up that suddenly sputtered was almost as enjoyable as seeing the final out made to break the "Curse of theBambino".

Skip ahead to 20??. Somewhere I will be tending to my future. Maybe chasing a little one around or heading up endless meetings at some job. The announcement of his retirement will be brief when I hear it. Probably during the off-season when news seems to go unnoticed. It may not cause much fanfare, but the memories and thoughts will stir like a crowd of 40,000 screaming for their fella to dig deep and hurl just one more strike.

Thanks Curt.

Bringing it home for Finn's

Who the hell plays softball in 40 degree weather during the month ofNovember? Finn McCools that's who. On a not so toasty evening in San Mateo a mostly sober crew pulled it together and won the 1st chipper for the new sponsor. Beating an old rival in a nail biter and then going ahead and topping that game with a comeback for the ages. The best line that summed it up was veteran 1st sacker Bryan "Jesus, is that thing evergoing to land" McKevitt rallying the troops during both games with "It's no secret why we're here". Good words my man.


As with any review of a championship team goes we start at the top. Field General Mark "the missing Coors Light twin" Schaukowitch put together a motley crew of hooligans and hot chicks. In trying to get a sound byte from the coach in the parking lot after the game I was met with screeching tires and a challenge to beat him to the bar. His line-up juggling and strong skills of fielding balls with his head turned towards the sky truly was the driving force behind this chipper.


The catcher for this drive to the championship was Jamie H. Following up her successful Rookie of the Year campaign in SSF she came up with the most clutch at-bat of her young career. Beating out a grounder inthe bottom of the 7th to extend the inning was by far the most important at-bat of the evening. Atta girl. Pitching for Finn's this evening was none other than Andy "I cant coach 3rd I have to rest" Dunning. Since he is a caveman and doesn't have email access we can rip all we want........but we won't. His 2 run gem against CBG cannot be put into words. You had to be there. Watching him hobble around the bases and take until he got a strike reminded me why Lions eat their young.


Picking errant throws and blasting moon shots @ 1st base was none other than McKevitt. While putting his cleats up for the off season he clearly stated why he is so successful in this game "They pitch it to you underhanded so...ya know what the fuck". Snaring hot shots and generally starting a rally when it was needed was none other than Tess "WTF"Pajarillo. In asking her what the trick was for her smacking the ball all over the park she simply stated "I whip my bf with a tree branch inthe back while he does the dishes and it sharpens my batting eye." Take note ladies. El Capitan of the infield was Shock with his steady glove and his cool headed approach. When defiance needed to be showed towards an umpire who couldn't make a call there was Shock offering a olive branch of peace by slowly rolling the ball to the umpire. A born leader. The hot corner was patrolled by our own fiery pistol Annette.Whether it be gracefully stabbing line drives or driving up our fan attendance with a wink and a smile this gal shows up to play. A key free agent acquisition during the summer.


Roaming the corner outfield positions were Diana and J-Lo fo sho.Whether it was D flashing her cannon and keeping folks from taking the extra base or Janice doing her best impression of Kung Fu-Matrix-Corkey from Life Goes On while trying to field a line drive there is never a dull moment with these gals. The middle of the outfield seemed to be where hits go to die. Whether its Richie serving up a little "What can brown do for you?" with his sure glove and timely hitting or Joe "Wheres the fire" Perna passing off his veteran wisdom to the younger players about recliner chairs and switch hitting. Often there is no words to describe a player who brings his A-game for the playoffs, but what good ol' Mike "Peck-Peck" Peckham brought on this crisp Wednesday evening was beyond words. Whether it was his sound assessment of his at-bats....I believe gay was how he described it......or his all out hustle to dive for flyballs without an open mitt. He definitely brought the right stuff to push this group over the hump.





"We are the Champions, my friends"

756

How can you dispute the number?

It's as daunting as Everest. It resonates in your ears when it is said in your direction. If only because 755 was so unimaginable.

I have long fallen on the side of the fence reserved for the "Haters" as one of my colleagues so eloquently put it one Sunday afternoon on the ball field. The only question I put to you(if you are a baseball fan)is How do you go about proving he isn't the greatest ball player of all-time?

You can blindly say you are a (fill in the blank) fan and can't stand his guts. That works for about a minute until he hits a shot out of your home stadium and your standing up with your dog in one hand and mouthing Oh my God as the ball crosses the moon like ET once did. You could stand up for the Moral Majority(are there any left?)who say that he cheated and his numbers from his Incredible Hulk days shouldn't be counted. Okay then. Where do we begin? Is it from where he supposedly got jealous of the '98 blind eye lovefest known as the McGwire-Sosa chase or around the time that YOU noticed he had turned into a true Giant with a new hat size and all. A little fuzzy on when that was? Trying to reach back to a point in time before he hit 73*. Chances are you can't pinpoint exactly when you noticed he was a freak of good lab practices, but that doesn't matter. You do know that before he became public enemy #1 he was the best baseball player in the game. Matching speed, defense and hitting. The proverbial 5-tool player just missing the postseason glory that cements your place with the Gods. Does it really matter if he ever admits that he cheated? My answer now has to be No.

Sweet Lou

So it's an early June Saturday and your home team is drowning in their typical June swoon. On the brink of losing their 6th game in a row and falling nine games under .500. If you look in the Baseball 101 manual there are few options given to a manager other than ride it out and hope the fans don't catch you in the parking lot. Lou Piniella decided to take a close call at 3rd base and craft his defining moment as the skipper of the Chicago Cubs. Having a world class fit that made Earl Weaver stand up and smile somewhere. Nobody at the time knew that Lou had just warned the Milwaukee Brewers that his boys, in the words of the immortal Robert Wuhl, had done enough lolly gagging.

A suspension was handed down and all critics decided to bury the Cubs as Overpaid underachievers, but his players witnessed how far their manager was willing to go for them. The loudest responses have been the numbers of Carlos Zambrano (9-2, 12 earned runs in 11 starts) and Alfonso Soriano(14 HR,30 RBI,40 RUNS) since the incident. Zambrano dug deep and had a 12K effort against the crosstown ChiSox and Soriano threw in a 3HR effort against the ATL later that month. Showing a more confrontational side was Derek Lee who would take a swing at Chris Young of the Padres less than a week after Piniella's hat kicking tirade.

The smoking embers that the Skipper had left on the field seemed to ignite each player over the next few weeks individually. Now as you open your local Sporting Green on August 2nd and browse the NL standings you may see something that seems out of place. Don't rub your eyes or go put your contacts in. The Cubbies really are in 1st place. As we march on towards October lets keep our eyes open to see what that crafty Ol' veteran Piniella has up his sleeve next. Do the North Siders dare dream of an October playoff berth...